Truth and Freedom
Last week, I realized that I told a select group of friends that I would meet them out for a girl’s night. I had promised thos group this girl’s night weeks prior to this night was to happen, but I never put the date of the girl’s night in my calendar. Weeks later, I had another friend ask me over for tea on the same night. Looking at my seemingly clear evening, I agreed. The night both of these events were promised, my son reminded me we had plans for something important to him. My phone dinged with the 2 different friend groups excited to see me (as my schedule is typically always full to the brim). For a moment in time, I thought about juggling all 3 events. Luckily, a moment of clarity hit, and I texted the 2 group of friends a text saying, “I am so sorry. I have to cancel tonight. I over promised my time. I don’t want to be the person who under delivers.”
Old Candace would have run around stressed and miserable, trying to keep everyone happy. I would have spent short amounts of time at all three promised events, constantly staring at my phone or setting alarms for strict leaving times. New Candace realizes the power of the word “No.” My son is such a huge part of my world❤️. He was my priority. I didn’t want to cut his time short due to my mind being preoccupied with thoughts of the next obligation. I simply could not have made all three obligations happily, so I didn’t. No is a complete sentence.
My son and I had a beautiful night filled with memories of us spending quality time together. The ladies continued on their nights having a great time without me. It felt fantastic living in my truth without stress. I realized from that night of missed events that I probably was super busy and in chaotic moments when I accepted the invites. I needed more time to process the ask and didn’t live in my truth and SAY those words. It is okay to tell others you will have to think about something or put the burden of the ask back on the individual who is asking and say “I am so swamped right now, could you please full circle back with me (time)?”
Lesson learned last night: Live in the realms of your controllable factors.
***Please note. I am NOT a medical doctor and I do not have any medical degrees. Everything written within these pages are from personal stand points and opinions. Please consult your physician/doctor/get medical advice for any and everything you do.
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